Find Gay Hookups Now
Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
Find Gay Hookups Now
| Blogs > Lynn1812 > Nerds on Harleys |
FWB no more...
|
FWB no more... Well, I can't really say that I'm surprised or that I don't understand it, but just the same, I am disappointed. This weekend, I was back home in Idaho for family business and while I was there, I took the time to get together with my long time FWB "Purrfect". I've mentioned her in a few blogs. She was the best lover I have ever been with and we spent much time together in the nearly 3 years prior to my taking a job in Seattle. But, despite our feelings for each other, this was never intended to be happy forever after. Our love wasn't pointed in that direction. Ultimately, she wasn't going to give up her home and family for me, nor was I going to sacrifice my career for her. 5 years ago, with my new job in Seattle, we became long distance lovers, getting together every time I found myself back home in Boise, which is regularly. For the first 3 years or so, it was enough to keep the flame alive, but in the last couple years, her correspondences had become more and more friendly and less loving and kissy. Bad timing and a reduction in my trips home have kept us apart for the last 2 years. We finally synced up for the trip this weekend, but I felt something was going to change. I never could find the words to ask ahead of time, and my intuition was right all along. We met in the morning at my hotel, visited and went to breakfast. But she was adamant that we would not be going back to the hotel. She said that she was done with that part of her life and was focusing on other things instead. Her gardening. Her Hospice work... I know that as people age, their sexual desires may fade, but it just seemed to me that as vibrant, eager and adventurous as she was in bed with me for all those years, to hear her say that she was just "done with sex" seemed hard to believe. Of course, I didn't push the issue, and didn't try to change her mind (well, not too hard), but in the end, we are now just friends... friends with NO benefits. And so ends the greatest sex partnership I ever had. |
||||
|
I do not believe she has lost her sex drive, I believe she has lost her interest in being a sex friend. As with anything in life, people want more not less, and if she cannot get what she needs from you, she is probably getting it or waiting on the right person to give it to her elsewhere.
| |||
|
They say that most women lose interest in sex during and after menopause....it could be a reason why she now feels like that...or perhaps she has moved on with someone else, and thought it was easier to say what she said..... I, after a 23 years long marriage, where the sex part was non existent 98% of the time, to put it loosely, and having gone thru menopause, am still wanting sex more than I ever did, BUT not as the only thing between me and a partner.....I find myself of wanting a more complete relationship, where sex is an important part of it, but still...a part of it, not all of it. I want something meaningful, where body, mind, and soul come together.....the best...if it would be for a hour, a day, a week or a year......how long it would last! My ex husband had many extra marital relationships which caused trust issues with me....I would like to work on getting over them, but feel as I need a man to help me with that, where I would be able to trust again. I do not want to "share" again. Unfortunately, it appears as men take these two factors as me wanting a serious commitment, something I don't even know if I would be willing to have, leaving me the very lonely woman that I now am, longing for a gentle touch, some loving arms around me, and yes, multiple mind blowing, toes curling orgasms, of which I'm very capable of.  WITHOUT PASSION LIFE IS NOTHING
| |||
|
Thanks, I do hope I find a new partner. I'm not ready to hang up my spurs just yet. Still, I am losing faith that that will happen. Since moving to Seattle, my love life = zero.
| |||
|
I do not believe she has lost her sex drive, I believe she has lost her interest in being a sex friend. As with anything in life, people want more not less, and if she cannot get what she needs from you, she is probably getting it or waiting on the right person to give it to her elsewhere.
| |||
|
Having experimented in the past with "sex without friendship", I learned that I have a strong preference for the friendship part first, sex second. Sex is WAY better if you are with someone that you truly care about and enjoy their company. No dirty NSA hook-ups for this cowboy... I get less sex, but I make up for it in quality.
| |||
|
They say that most women lose interest in sex during and after menopause....it could be a reason why she now feels like that...or perhaps she has moved on with someone else, and thought it was easier to say what she said..... I, after a 23 years long marriage, where the sex part was non existent 98% of the time, to put it loosely, and having gone thru menopause, am still wanting sex more than I ever did, BUT not as the only thing between me and a partner.....I find myself of wanting a more complete relationship, where sex is an important part of it, but still...a part of it, not all of it. I want something meaningful, where body, mind, and soul come together.....the best...if it would be for a hour, a day, a week or a year......how long it would last! My ex husband had many extra marital relationships which caused trust issues with me....I would like to work on getting over them, but feel as I need a man to help me with that, where I would be able to trust again. I do not want to "share" again. Unfortunately, it appears as men take these two factors as me wanting a serious commitment, something I don't even know if I would be willing to have, leaving me the very lonely woman that I now am, longing for a gentle touch, some loving arms around me, and yes, multiple mind blowing, toes curling orgasms, of which I'm very capable of.
| |||
|
i have had many many married men tell me that their wives totally lost their interest in sex when they hit menopause. had a hard time understanding that as nothing changed for me, I have always had a higher than normal libido if with someone who has the same desires and limits as myself. btw the long distance relationships sometimes, for me, get a little hard, making me want to avoid them because of the empty space they leave when you have to say goodbye for a while...it is easier to just avoid contact than ride the rollercoaster of fulfillment and emptiness... Laissez les bons temps rouler!
| |||
|
l am sorry about your FB. Times always change everything. l just feel the same way like you , l just blog my experience in " Heartbreak or Heartless" FB when apart it's also hit feelings.
| |||
|
Lynn I am really sorry to hear this about your FWB. I thought this girl was going to be around for a very long time.. You know people do change their minds. Wishing you all the best.. hugssssssssssssssssssssss V Become a blog watcher sweet_vm
|
Become a member to create a blog
