Find Gay Hookups Now
Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
Find Gay Hookups Now
| Blogs > Loreli_Seawytch_ > My Blog |
Looking into the Mirror
|
Looking into the Mirror She sat in front of her dressing table mirror Her eyes wide, searching, wondering Where had she gone, where had that happy go lucky, rebellious young woman gone. She looked again a smile lit up her face There she was, that young girl, so naïve so trusting, she saw again the huge amethyst eyes fringed with long thick dark brown curling lashes, teamed with her long red hair that hung in ringlets. She knew she was not beautiful like he sister. She had never cared, beauty about outward appearances t hey never mattered to her, more important was intelligence, a caring heart, a heart that did not judge but had a lust to see new countries experience new cultures. Lordy she had done that, packed her backpack at 17, with her return ticket and $500, she and her girlfriend Lissa and backpacked, hitched from Johannesburg to Alexandria. It had taken 12 months. She smiled again seeing the days of laughter, the amazing people she had met, marching against apartheid listening to Steve Beeko talk, in the Soweto Football Stadium, her sorrow on hearing of his death. Working for a short time in the animal shelter, her love of elephants had begun there such beautiful creatures, when you looked into their eyes and saw ancient knowledge, a serenity and yet sometimes such sadness yes magnificent creatures. Her , her sweet babies how she had loved them how she cherished and dreamed of what they would grow up to become, the grief the unbearable grief when in a split second her wonderful life was torn to shreds, standing in the chapel watching as their caskets disappeared behind the curtains. Focusing all her love and dreams on her remaining , it was so hard, she wanted to protect her, wrap her in cotton wool. Not let her be hurt… but to be fair to her she could not do that she had to allow her to live her life her way. A large sigh escaped, she had made mistakes, in how she went about it, but she was determined to let her live her own life, make her own mistakes, suffer as a man let her down; Loosing a friend to death or a new job in a new land. But always she was there in the background, a shoulder to cry on, someone to listen, someone who gave unconditional love, never judged her, was always proud of her achievements and the wonderful, intelligent caring woman she had grown into. Yes looking into the mirror she caught glimpses, but more and more a strangers face stared back at her, the rich copper auburn hair now sprinkled with grey, the deep colour amethyst faded to a soft lavender. A network of as she called them laughter lines covered her once smooth Ivory face. Her neck now also a mass of turkey lines, her once slim body thickened with the years. She sighed, the years had flown so quickly, the travels, the jobs in the refugee camps, the nights spent dancing, the days filled with who smiled and laughed who had nothing yet acted as if they had everything. They taught her humility, an understanding of how lucky she was How blessed in fact she had a home to go to, her homeland was not torn apart with war, famine yes they had taught her, their voices raised in song still echoed in her brain. Looking once more into the mirror, she saw that her time was running out, her time to leave this existence coming closer and closer. She thought she would face it with calmness, but she found there was a little fear. She shook her head to clear it, enough Bella, enough, it was time to leave for the university to pick up her new charge, she loved her life, the young overseas students she took into her home guided through their studies to either speak fluent English or obtain degrees. Returning home gaining a good job, marrying and having of their own. Many over the years had become good friends still keeping in touch via the internet, Skype visits either to Australia or her visit to their homelands. Mentally they helped her feel young, and gave her hope for this planet. Such wonderful young people just starting out on their journey of life…. She envied them, yet did not… yes life was good and till she was called to begin a new existence she would live her life to the best of her ability, enjoying every single hour. 
|
Become a member to create a blog
