Would you could you.
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Posted:Nov 9, 2008 12:07 pm
Last Updated:May 21, 2024 2:8 pm
6612 Views
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Would you could you.
seeing the smile on your face
makes my world a better place
if there is anything i can do
could i do it please with you
if i asked you out for a date
would you be more than a mate
if i asked you to be my lover
i'd care for you like no other
would you accept my invitation
though i'm from another nation
let me have one chance to show
to you, how much i love you so.
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Consider It Sold.
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Posted:Nov 8, 2008 7:09 am
Last Updated:Nov 10, 2008 1:02 am
6653 Views
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So as I awake, on this cold November morn
Well it�s almost midday as I was up till dawn
Remember as a when told to go to bed
Still hearing those words echoing in my head
Stop messing about and will you go to sleep
Or you will be grounded for all of next week
Oh the words administered to an unruly
Often ignored will make the parent more wild
As we grow up, ourselves parents we become
Overnight we�ve turned into our dad or mum
Now living on my own, as so many often are
And still searching for a love be it near or far
Wonder will you read this and what you think
And will you send me a reply a kiss or a wink
Smiles on your face of your pictures I�ve seen
The best I have saved on my computer screen
I believe you�re a person with a heart of gold
So this poem I write is just for the love I hold
Like expensive jewels can be bought I�m told
If your love was for sale then consider it sold
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Viagra
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Posted:Nov 3, 2008 3:05 pm
Last Updated:Nov 7, 2008 1:26 pm
6800 Views
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In Pharmacology, all drugs have a generic name....
Panadol is "Paracetamol"
Amoxil is "Amoxicillin"
Nurofen is "Ibuprofen"
and so on.....
The federal drug administration has been looking for a generic name for Viagra?
and announced that it has settled on....
"Mycoxafloppin"
also considered were...
"Mycoxafailin"
"Mydixadrupin"
"Mydixarisin"
"Mydixadud"
"Dixafix"
& of coarse...
"Ibepokin"
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Neibourhood Watch.
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Posted:Nov 3, 2008 2:51 pm
Last Updated:Nov 6, 2008 7:16 pm
6827 Views
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In the paper it said....
During the cold weather look out for your neighbours!
My next door neibour is 87
and not once has the old bitch visited me to see if i'm OK!
Worse still...
The lazy old fucker, hasn't even taken her milk in for the last 2 weeks!
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Sex In The Shower Survey!
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Posted:Nov 3, 2008 2:40 pm
Last Updated:Nov 7, 2008 1:25 pm
6744 Views
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In a recent survey 85% of "Scousers"
(a term used to describe locals from Liverpool)
said they enjoyed having sex in the shower....
the other 15% said they hadn't been to prison yet!
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Medical Machine.
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Posted:Nov 3, 2008 2:29 pm
Last Updated:Nov 4, 2008 6:37 pm
6741 Views
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A store installed a medical machine that for £5 & a urine sample would diagnose any condition.
When Jim went with a sore elbow, the computer printout read...
you have tennis elbow.
soak it in warm water & avoid heavy work for 2 weeks.
Impressed! Jim wondered if he coukd fool the machine?
He mixed tap water with poo,
urine samples from his wife & ,
then added some of his semen!
the next day after he had tipped it into the machine...
the printout read...
1.your tap water is too hard...use softner.
2.your has ringworm... give it antibiotics.
3.your is on cocaine...get her to rehab.
4.your with is expecting twins, not your's...get a lawyer!
5.if you keep playing with yourself...your elbow wont get any better!
Thanks for shopping here!!
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Withered & Gone
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Posted:Oct 29, 2008 6:28 pm
Last Updated:Nov 7, 2008 1:24 pm
7166 Views
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Inspired by my friend nakedarkangel
from her post Today, Another Leaf Has Fallen
As my face withers with each passing year
But now at an age where I don’t really care
Yes, gone are the days of my vibrant youth
Bags under my eyes are sure enough proof
Nothing anyone can do to halt this decline
A process we all endure during our lifetime
So when the time comes to depart this land
My soul will be released I hope as planned
Lying in the mortuary and without a sound
To be embalmed in a box put in the ground
And as my body is wrapped and put to rest
In silence as you weep in your Sunday best
My ageing now stopped and it is time to go
As the curtains close it is the end of a show
You may say your farewell or just goodbye
Remember my name with tears in your eye
Like all the words I wrote in poem or song
A soul now resting where it should belong
Like a leaf on a tree that fell to the ground
Is blown by a wind in Heaven to be found
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Blind Date
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Posted:Oct 23, 2008 7:24 pm
Last Updated:Oct 25, 2008 6:57 am
6849 Views
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Blind Date.
So how was your blind date?
A college student asked her room mate.
Terrible! She replied..
He showed up in a 1932 Rolls Royce…
Wow! That’s an expensive car, what’s so bad about that?
He was the original owner!
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Teacher
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Posted:Oct 23, 2008 7:22 pm
Last Updated:Oct 25, 2008 6:58 am
6820 Views
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Teacher.
A teacher was asking her class…
What is the difference between “unlawful” & “illegal”?
One hand shot up…
OK Joan what is your answer?
Well, “unlawful” is when you do something the law doesn’t allow & “illegal” is
A sick Eagle.
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Tooth Extraction
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Posted:Oct 23, 2008 7:18 pm
Last Updated:Oct 24, 2008 5:02 pm
6783 Views
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Tooth Extraction.
Patient:
How much to pull out this tooth?
Dentist:
£90.00
Patient:
£90.00 for just a few minutes work????
Dentist:
I can extract it very slowly if you like…
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Olympic Condoms
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Posted:Oct 23, 2008 7:16 pm
Last Updated:Oct 24, 2008 5:04 pm
6776 Views
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Olympic Condoms.
A man is out shopping & discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms.
Impressed he buys a pack.
Upon getting home he announces to his wife what he has just bought.
Olympic Condoms? She blurts… whats so special about them?
3 colours… he replies, gold, silver & bronze.
So which colour had you planned on wearing tonight? She asks cheekily.
Gold! Of coarse.. Says the man proudly.
Well really.. Says the woman, why don’t you wear silver?
It would be nice if you came 2nd for a change.
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Wisdom of Youth
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Posted:Oct 23, 2008 7:13 pm
Last Updated:Oct 24, 2008 5:03 pm
6782 Views
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Wisdom of Youth.
Dad:
“, how can you call your Aunt stupid?
Now go & say sorry to her”
:
(goes over to Aunt)
“Aunt, I am sorry you are stupid”
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Be Thankful
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Posted:Oct 23, 2008 7:10 pm
Last Updated:Oct 27, 2008 9:45 pm
6749 Views
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Be Thankful.
According to a newspaper report, being thankful & gracious may extend your life?…..
So thanks to the girl who gave me herpes!
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To link to this blog (Adie2pleaseyou) use [blog Adie2pleaseyou] in your messages.
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& Dreams...
