How To Tell If You're A Grinch
|
Posted:Dec 1, 2006 8:55 am
Last Updated:May 22, 2024 7:5 pm
4028 Views
|
heres my funny of the day.....
hope u enjoy 
How To Tell If You're A Grinch
Your only contact with three spirits on Christmas Eve
Is gin, vodka and bourbon.
You turn on the lawn sprinklers on Christmas Eve
To keep carolers away.
You buy all of your Christmas gifts at a
Store that also sells gas.
Your idea of Christmas dinner is a
Six pack of beer and a cheese log.
You use your Christmas Club money
To buy wrestling tickets.
Your only holiday decoration is a rotting pumpkin.
You reuse last year's Christmas cards and
Send them out under your own name.
You steal light bulbs from you neighbor's outdoor
Display to replenish your own supply.
After an invitation to a friend's house, you bring a commercially
produced fruitcake and try to pass it off as home made.
You steal gifts from the Toys-for-Tots collection bins.
You put out last year's stale candy canes for .
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
what do u think about my profile ???
|
Posted:Nov 30, 2006 11:55 pm
Last Updated:Oct 15, 2008 12:37 am
4219 Views
|
Profile for crystalclear4u2
IF UR MARRIED,ENGAGED,IN A SERIOUS RELASIONSHIP PLEASE MOVE ON I DONT DATE THOSES GUYS !!!
i'm a passionette open minded smart wild funny sexy interesting 100 % real woman.i live in the S.E. corner of kansas.i'm not a skinny mini barbie doll all perfect but then i dont expect u to be either.i'm a curvy girl a few extra pounds but i can be just as sexy & erotic as barbie giggles maybe even more.
i'm looking to find that man that can make me shiver & beg for more.i dont need him to survive been doing that ok myself,but i want him.i'm tired of the dating games its fun but way to often i'm still at home lonely & frustrated mostly by choice i dont just want to settle for or jump on just anyone lol i'm kinda picky why shouldnt i be ???
i have so much to give & share.i would love to be ur princess but not afraid to get my hands dirty either.giggles i'm not shy thats for sure.i do know what i want & i'm not afraid to tell u just what i need but its a 2 way street so come on talk to me tell me its so much eazyer than the head games so many play.
i do love to hike,canoe,camp,dinning out,romantic moon lite walks,fishing i even bait my own hook & take the fish off lol,long soaks in the hottub,wild hot sex,playing pool,kissing & cuddles,long deep talks,laughing,teasing,hockey games,public shows of affection,cooking,traveling,did i mention great sex lol,watching the sun come up as well as go down..... theres so much more to me i'm a intrigueing crazy mix of alittle bit of everything just ask me.....i'm also willing to try new things heck u never know if ur gonna like it or not if u dont try .....giggles i'm in here arent i ??( i do have limits ok ).
i suck at spelling & grammer as u have noticed but i'm realy a very witty smart passionette chick (a dangerous mix giggles a woman with a mind omg lol but i'm one hella fun interesting combo).if ur brave enough & up for a adventurous life trip maybe we should talk.just remember tho i'm looking for one port to dock at not a trip to every port in here.giggles theres plenty of them here to keep u buzy.
what am i looking for??? please be REAL or do me a favor move on down the line save us both the time,frustration & major headaches.
TO START PLEASE NO MARRIED MEN !!!
i would like to see a close up face shot with ur eyes,full body shots r kwel to. if u mail me so please send one if u contact me.giggles its only fair u know what i look like.i understand why some might not post ur face but if u want possible contact with me mmmmm i need to know what u look like lol.i'm not shallow but i do need that physical attraction just as much as u do.plus think about it a min why would i spill my heart out to u when ur a faceless stranger.
mmmmmmm well ok here gose.....i'm looking for the perfect man for me.r u out there?? looks help but they realy come from within ...giggles of course a hot bod with a cute face dosent hurt either but haveing a good heart ,great personialy,soft touch but strong & manly,confidance,someone who will make me crazy with desire.....wins extra brownie points.i'm looking for a guy to fullfill my life.someone who will make me feel like a princess & sometimes a dirty lil'gurl.someone that makes my knees go weak when he touch's me & makes me scream with pleasure.i'm not a shallow person but there has to be a physical & mental attraction to make it even more fantastic.your reading this so you must of been attracted to me he he he he or bored & needed a good novel to read.
he must be open minded not jealous we all have a past giggles thats what makes us who we r.looking for a faithfull honest real man someone to grow in life with not just sexualy(even tho thats VERY VERY important & giggles i need it just as much maybe more) but also in everyday life activities to.
i dont wanta be just a sex only date.....not realy looking for just sex only(if i was i would be booked solid lol) dont get me wronge with that one guy i want it to be mmmmmm erotic fantasys cum true filled with passion crazy hot nasty wild wet sex & it will be.but i want the whole package...not a one niter or just a few hrs if i'm lucky. thats what ur gonna get with me the whole package !!!
i want just ONE special guy if u think u wanta take a risk in love & think u can handle me....i'm at least 2 handfulls mmmmmm ok maybe more he he he.i think, no i know that my prince will be more than sastisfied if he ever finds me.please let me know the sooner the better.mmmmmmm giggles ur fantasy princess awaites ur kisses....hurry up get over here
again IF UR MARRIED PLEASE DOOOOOO NOT CONTACT ME .I DONT DATE MARRIED GUYS !!!! it pisses ur wifes off,hurts lots of inocent people & i dont want her showing up later wanting to beat my ass just cuz u wanted a piece of my sweet ass.theres tons of other women who like to mess with that kinda dangerous thang but i'm not one of them .
somehow i was elected moderator of one of the groups lol its called the Joplin "O" ZONE so if u wanta join my group jump on board lol.all the postings in there might not reflect my thoughts but hey its america a free country that i'm proud to be a part of.so who am i to restrict others thoughts & quests in life.join & post away lol
My Ideal Person:
giggles look above ......i belive i covered it or ask me .
What are your favorite musicians or bands?:
way to many to choose but gotta have some pink floyde & led zepplin
Tell one of your favorite sexual fantasies. Don't hold back!:
theres so many cant pick just one .ask me
What location do you fantasize about for a sexual encounter?:
A remote wilderness spot, waterfall,juzzui,big feather bed,car
What types of sexual activities turn you on?:
Giving Oral Sex, Receiving Oral Sex, Anal Sex, Toys (Vibrators/Dildos/etc.), Light Bondage, Spanking, Role Playing, Slave/Master, Mutual Masturbation, Food Play, Making Home "Movies", Participating in Erotic Photography, Voyeurism, Handcuffs/Shackles, Blindfolds
Ever fantasized about having sex with a celebrity? Who? What turns you on about them?:
giggles mmmm which one ???
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
whats everyone looking for
|
Posted:Nov 30, 2006 10:01 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2007 12:31 am
4184 Views
|
i know what i'm looking for but how about others .....is it just a one nite romp,a friends with bennys,someone to hang out with,a e-mail buddy or a long term thang??
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
