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| Blogs > lasiren > musings from the sea |
reality check
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reality check When you meet someone with an identical set of turn-ons, a perfectly compatible body, and a lifestyle that matches your own, isn't it a natural progression to want to move toward intimacy? The world really should work that way, but when ghosts from the past come into the fold, the possibility of more becomes clouded. We've all been hurt. We've all fallen for the wrong person, or had timing blow our hopes away. Arenas like this one are safe spaces. We can look, reach out, connect, with very little emotional investment. And when your fingertips brush the very thing you want most, when they find momentary purchase in silky skin, perfect scent, soft lips, it's almost as if it were real. It's too easy to forget the way things used to go. The key points that set the other times apart, the in-the-flesh, real-life, risk taking, the extended flirtation, the familiarity of proximity and build up are elements that become escalated here. This can be confusing. The website asks us to have a certain number of messages before we open the door to reality. Our minds sometimes lose sight of the difference. The body doesn't care. In fact, it prefers to use shorthand. To skip the difficult parts and move straight to the fucking satisfies like free money. When one finds one's self in the arms of a stranger, or with a pocketful of unearned cash, is the validity of hard work there? Is it needed? In this world, at this moment, for some of us, the lack is clearly defined. Which is not to say that I would pass up a windfall, just that it may not ever feel like it's mine. |
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2/22/2007 8:33 am |
You make an interesting point. But also consider that the site, instead of creating the fast track, facilitates the fastness desired by the consumer. Hell, I know if I were paying for this place, I wouldn't want to be spending a bunch of money for a gradual wooing. Believe me, if I'm with a woman, I like to think that I've earned it. No one's doing me a favor or anything. But there are times, and people (myself included sometimes) that are lonely, desperate, or just so balls to the wall horny that they don't care how they get it, just that they get it, then they can work on being better, and earning other encounters. You compare a quickie to a windfall, whereas it can also be looked at as a quick return on a previous investment. It may not feel like it's yours, at least not at first, but it can be. If you find a man on here (coughs innocently) that you take home just for the sake of it, I'm pretty sure that you can get them to stay if you want to extend the relations, and then build toward it being something that is yours, if only for a short time.
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2/22/2007 6:37 pm |
damn your good 
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At its essence, this feeling is the downfall of the "Me" generation which has been marketed successfully by Madison Avenue ever since the intitial movement from the 60's was distorted in the late-70s. Contrary to popular belief, each of us does not deserve everything we want just because we want it. But we can still want it. Freedom is not total freedom to do anything we want (including injure, insult, infringe on others) just becase we want to do it. But we can still want to do it. I believe desires and freedoms without a core set of values driving them leads to the sense of unfilfillment you describe. This applies to many things in life, including sexual exploration. I am not advocating that we revert to the Puritan ethic on which this country was founded. I like having a range of values in society and all this entails. But one should think a little before he or she plunges in...or at least make a reasoned decision that this particular moment is for pure physical lust without any mental connection - but know why you are doing it! Too many people have not thought of the reasons why they do things and just act as sheep or just for consumption (they think more is better - it has to be). What do you think?
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3/10/2007 6:25 pm |
LIKe you said we've all been hurt.That is a post full of wisdom.To bad we can't have it all?? I was married a long time stayed for my sons.The point is not sure if it was worth it?
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We all've been searching.. Through chemicals and religion to the rainbow's end. But all's we've got is a pot of gold... Dan
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