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Blogs > Canice70 > Midnight Ramblings

How to tell what a woman is like in bed by what she drinks.  

Canice70 51M
334 posts
6/15/2009 12:27 pm

Last Read:
10/26/2009 12:47 pm
How to tell what a woman is like in bed by what she drinks.

I found this article on a website . Being a former bartender myself, I found it intriguing, at the least. Opinions are encouraged either for or against...

"So what is the perfect cocktail for a night of raucous debauchery? Just call me The Sexual Mixologist because after nights of exhausting research, I have determined the sexual effects of various types of alcohols. To gain a little insight into your late night plans, consider her drink of choice:

Whisk(e)y: There is a reason the slogan for Pendleton Canadian Whisky is "Let'er Buck": whisk(e)y chicks can buck all night. These girls are wild and probably no stranger to the mechanical bull in your local dive bar. Snag one of these firecrackers and you are in store for a wild night of girl-on-top sex. Feel free to give her a little spank -- don't worry, she'll like it.

Vodka: In the words of Stoli, vodka gals embody "Pure Thrill." These ladies are flirty, fun, and a little kinky if nudged. Sex is by no means limited to the bedroom. Suggest having sex while sitting in a chair. This position makes her feel in control and offers you a great view of her assets.

Tequila: Any girl who downs shots of tequila lives by the motto of Olmeca Tequila, "...and the fun goes on!" And it does go on... and on... and on... until the wee hours of the morning. Forget quickies, tequila gals have the stamina for marathon sex sessions that leave the sheets tangled in a heap on the floor. They prefer it rough, with lots of hard thrusting, so doggie style works best. Bonus points (and moans) for indulging in a little light hair pulling.

Rum: Get ready to bust out the whipped cream and furry handcuffs because rum girls are all about playful and energetic sex. Probably the result of drinking fermented sugar cane. These hyper ladies are all about variety so expect lots of position changes. Now is the time to break out the toys or don a costume. Still, if that seems like too much effort for a booty call, whisper softly into her ear, "Got a little Captain in you?"

Beer: Not to be a buzz kill, but I think Courage Beer's slogan, "It's what your right arm's for," sums up your night pretty accurately. Beer is filling -- especially for girls -- and if she has drank enough of it to be drunk, there is a good chance sex is going to consist of her lying there like a dead fish. It is hard to feel sexy when your stomach is bloated and you have peed 12 times in the last two hours. And if she does not pass out and leave you to make use of your right hand, feel lucky getting missionary style.

Red Wine: If you are not our boyfriend already, there is a good chance we want you to be. Blame the television show "The Bachelor" and its continuous day dates to vineyards, but for whatever reason, women associate wine with romance. It makes us feel sexy and in sync with our partners. After a long night of wine drinking, expect soft, slow, sensual sex with lots of eye contact and deep kissing. No need to limit the exchange to missionary though; winos are also fans of the spoon position and doggie style while lying down. Be prepared to cuddle afterwards.

So the next time you are at the bar talking to a cute girl, avert your eyes from her cleavage for a moment, and take a look inside her glass. The findings might surprise you. Cheers."

So what does your drink say about you, folks?
KILL YOUR TELEVISION!!!


Opals_fire 60F
2984 posts
6/15/2009 5:19 pm

 :"< so put rum and tequila together...........and you get an opal!


Opals_fire 60F
2984 posts
6/15/2009 5:20 pm

 oops geeeeeez.

by the wya, I keep saying I've quit drinking tequila, I seem to have trouble keeping my clothes on when I drink that stuff! lol


Canice70 51M
2070 posts
6/15/2009 7:25 pm

 I think I'm gonna throw a big party with a well-stocked bar for all my blogwatchers.
Anyone care to speculate on how THAT would turn out?!?
KILL YOUR TELEVISION!!!


dimplesfouryou 53F
24690 posts
7/30/2009 9:25 am

 Tee, hee, hee! That was a funny one!

Considering I drink just about everything but tequila, I found some hilarity in each entry! Mainly, though, I am a vodka gal...
Dimps


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